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If we do it..
at 16:46 1 May 2024

This.

As well as the interminable wait for Saturday to cope with, I have a Southern League play-off semi-final at Telford tonight as well. I'm required to read out the "don't go on the pitch" warning on the PA before and during the game, but I doubt that anyone will a) take any notice apart from booing me (fully deserved) and b) take any action against anyone who does.

Assuming the Bucks get past tonight and we host the final on Monday, this bank holiday weekend could be unbelievable/unforgettable/messy/all of the above.
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Great moments in British Comedy
at 16:35 5 Feb 2024

Most of mine have already been covered off:
Answering the previous question
All the right notes
Del Boy and the bar hatch
..and the mention of Spoon Jar Jar Spoon makes me smile just thinking about it.

May I respectfully add the following - firstly a classic:


And something more up to date, incredibly subversive and scarily ahead of it's time:
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Anyone been put onto Sertraline for their MH
at 14:32 4 Jan 2024

Been on 50mg for nearly two years now. Occasional tummy ache and slightly less energy than I used to have but the benefits more than outweigh those downsides.
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Cricket
at 14:08 6 Nov 2023

Indeed - he could also have faced up and backed out during the run up, causing the umpire to call dead ball - and I take the point about slow over rates as well.

I do wonder how it would have worked out if he'd have faced up without a helmet. Would the Bangladeshi bowler have sent down an obvious leave or a ball which was designed to make him protect his bonce at all costs, even if he spliced it/edged it for a catch? Also, had he been seriously injured or worse by a bouncer on the skull, it may well have put him in an awkward position as regards insurance. There's a lot of conflicting ideas with this one which probably wouldn't have been there if the oppo had withdrawn the appeal or the umpire had called time out for an equipment change.
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Cricket
at 12:13 6 Nov 2023

I'm really not sure about this now. Matthews' helmet strap broke as he was putting it on. He was already standing by the wicket and would have been ready to face had he not had an equipment malfunction. It's made him the first batsman in international cricket to be given out, timed out.

Rules are rules I guess, but I feel that one of the tests a bowling captain should always apply is 'how would I react to being given out like that?'. It certainly doesn't make me any less certain that Bangladesh applied the rules in their strictest sense in order to grab a bonus wicket.
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Cricket
at 10:39 6 Nov 2023

There's a bit of a 'sprit of cricket' thing here again.

Bangladesh appealed because Matthews couldn't find a suitable helmet within 2 minutes of the previous batsman being given out, and upheld that appeal when the umpires checked. Under the rules he has to be ready to face within 2 minutes, but it feels like Bangladesh are taking advantage to get rid of a dangerous batsman.
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The Beatles new single
at 16:51 2 Nov 2023

Just playing it in the office when I saw your thread. I must admit I wasn't expecting much, but first up it's a really good song. The work that has gone in to getting it to this point is incredible as well so it's a winner for me. The four note phrase has already found its way in to my head as well.
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Best Chocolate Bars
at 16:01 2 Nov 2023

The answer is Double Decker.

Best from the fridge so the nougat is chewy.
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London group
at 12:06 17 Oct 2023

Perfect. Thanks BD. I'll get him to get in touch with you.
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London group
at 11:01 17 Oct 2023

My son is at Uni in London and wants to get involved with a supporters group down there if there is such a thing. Has anyone got any contact details?
Thanks.
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Starmer will probably be an excellent PM
at 16:51 9 Oct 2023

Like this one for example (which I know you've already seen Mullet) from my godforsaken local MP:

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HS2....
at 08:26 4 Oct 2023

And now the revised plan is Euston to Birmingham Curzon Street and Fradley (a big industrial estate just north of Lichfield) where it will join the West Coast Main Line and compete for space on an already overcrowded line to get to Manchester.

So still no direct connection in Birmingham and pootling along behind a standard Avanti going north.

Now THAT'S utter nonsense.
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HS2....
at 16:29 3 Oct 2023

Utter nonsense is a bit strong.

Curzon Street is half a mile on foot from New Street. The Metro line to it (when built) will split from the main line on Bull Street, and whilst there may be a service from Edgbaston to Deritend via Grand Central this hasn't been confirmed yet so passengers may have to walk up to the top of Corp. Street to catch it, by which time they may as well have walked to Curzon Street. (Apologies to other readers whilst we have a discussion on the geography of Birmingham)

Well done on being able to sneak out of New Street quicker than everyone else. Not everyone will have the local knowledge that you (and I) have - and end up queuing for the escalators up to concourse level, then queuing for the ticket barrier and then finding their way out via Stephenson Street or Grand Central.

I assume that the operators of HS2 will offer some kind of through ticket from New Street onwards via the Metro like they do with journeys via London Termini using the Tube. They'll have to, otherwise no one will bother.

The rest of my post remains even if you dispute the Birmingham bit. Old Oak Common is next to HMP Wormwood Scrubs, not even close to the centre of town. Onward travel will be by the Lizzy, a line that was never built for that purpose. It's a lovely modern rail line, but if HS2 usage takes off (big if), it will get very crowded very quickly.
[Post edited 3 Oct 2023 16:41]
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HS2....
at 10:48 3 Oct 2023

To be precise, Digbeth to Wormwood Scrubs but that doesn't sound as attractive.

The Birmingham end has been a joke from the start. Curzon Street is outside the city centre, a half mile walk from the main rail hub at New Street, so passengers will have to disembark at New Street, get out of the station which can take ages during the rush hour, then walk or get the as yet unbuilt Midland Metro to Curzon Street. They will then travel to a park on the edge of London on HS2 where they will then have to get on the Lizzy (already pretty crowded) to get anywhere useful.

I suspect it will actually end up being quicker overall to stay on the train you came in to Brum on/get the Avanti from New Street and go straight to Euston, than it will to go through all that hassle just to get on the HS2.
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OK, side plate then....
at 16:58 21 Sep 2023

It had hairy knees and massive eyes.

That's not a spider, it's a Gruffalo. (One for the mid-2000s parents there)
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When did people stop saying 'colour'
at 11:36 24 Aug 2023

If we're going to have a general moan about odd uses of words, can I offer up "shop". I go shopping to a shop, but according to advertising bods, I no longer browse, it's my opportunity to "shop" their range.

And as for the use of "try and" rather than "try to"......
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U.K. Cities Ending in Vowels (Quiz)
at 16:25 14 Aug 2023

Officiallly no, but unofically if you're going to cry I'll try to see if anyone can fly to your help.
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U.K. Cities Ending in Vowels (Quiz)
at 15:42 14 Aug 2023

7/9.

I can't believe I missed the 4th English one as my family hails from there. I'd never have got the second Scottish one - I didn't even know it was a city.
[Post edited 14 Aug 2023 15:44]
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On the huh
at 10:47 26 Jul 2023

I seem to annoy my partner by referring to her as 'bab', calling my friends 'jockey', and using the words 'sommat' instead of something, 'ar' instead of yes, and 'dunna' instead of don't (as in 'dunna worry'). These are all West Midland/Birmingham/Telford-isms.

Her issue is that she is the West Midlander, whereas I am from Essex and moved up here 30 years ago.

I will still never forgive her and all of the locals for referring to a roundabout (the circular traffic junction) as an Island, which around here is pronounced 'Oiland'. It's even on the road signs - apparently I live just off Heath Hill Island in Telford. It's a ruddy roundabout!!!
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People who like their live music
at 10:40 11 Jul 2023

I've given up with Arena gigs. It's partly an age thing because I don't want to pay upwards of £80 to watch the artist on a big screen in an acoustically useless cave, but it's also because a lot of the artists I like are now at the smaller venue stage anyway.

So I won't be paying to see Depeche Mode at the NIA Birmingham in January, but I will be watching Dadi Freyr at The Halls Wolverhampton in November and Howard Jones/ Blancmange at Symphony Hall Birmingham in October.
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