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No Wood 09:27 - Jun 5 with 57038 viewswkj

I was having a chat with the person who tends the various patches of common land this morning and he reckons you're allowed no wood in the gardening waste wheelie bin. Bit rubbish isn't it if you can't put limbs and the sort in the brown bin?
[Post edited 23 Feb 2021 19:16]

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No wood on 19:38 - Jun 11 with 4636 viewsfooters

No wood on 19:35 - Jun 11 by WeWereZombies

But we were making love by Wednesday...


This is now a matter for the police.

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No wood on 19:42 - Jun 11 with 4624 viewsWeWereZombies

No wood on 19:38 - Jun 11 by footers

This is now a matter for the police.


Well she was wrapped around my finger...

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No wood on 19:46 - Jun 11 with 4618 viewswkj

Can we please not hijack my serious post about arbor matters in no way related to the signing of a recent striker please.

Many thanks

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No wood on 19:48 - Jun 11 with 4612 viewsWeWereZombies

No wood on 19:46 - Jun 11 by wkj

Can we please not hijack my serious post about arbor matters in no way related to the signing of a recent striker please.

Many thanks


OK Cinnamon queen.

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No wood on 19:49 - Jun 11 with 4609 viewswkj

No wood on 19:48 - Jun 11 by WeWereZombies

OK Cinnamon queen.


Is that your Sunday company?

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No wood on 23:44 - Jun 11 with 4586 viewsWeWereZombies

No wood on 19:49 - Jun 11 by wkj

Is that your Sunday company?


I had Sunday free before I started with a bottle of Moet on Monday

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yep (n/t) on 16:19 - Jun 26 with 4518 viewsBobbyDazzler

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No wood on 14:49 - Jul 14 with 4418 viewswkj

No wood on 23:44 - Jun 11 by WeWereZombies

I had Sunday free before I started with a bottle of Moet on Monday


Nothing like No wood and scoring a glass of Moet

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No wood on 14:58 - Jul 14 with 4403 viewsfooters

No wood on 14:49 - Jul 14 by wkj

Nothing like No wood and scoring a glass of Moet


Moet's the champagne of Sun readers. Real wine drinkers don't touch the stuff at all, and if they did it wouldn't be Moet.

Napoleon was actually the one responsible for champagne's relative notoriety, but it's a very poor wine in reality, hence why it has to be chilled and carbonised so heavily.

And, fun fact: champagne as we know it couldn't have been possible were it not for glass-makers in Newcastle, who had the know-how to make bottles strong enough to handle the pressure generated by champagne's second in-bottle fermentation (a big no-no amongst winemakers generally...).

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No wood on 15:09 - Jul 14 with 4389 viewswkj

No wood on 14:58 - Jul 14 by footers

Moet's the champagne of Sun readers. Real wine drinkers don't touch the stuff at all, and if they did it wouldn't be Moet.

Napoleon was actually the one responsible for champagne's relative notoriety, but it's a very poor wine in reality, hence why it has to be chilled and carbonised so heavily.

And, fun fact: champagne as we know it couldn't have been possible were it not for glass-makers in Newcastle, who had the know-how to make bottles strong enough to handle the pressure generated by champagne's second in-bottle fermentation (a big no-no amongst winemakers generally...).


Almost as good as Cava then?

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No wood on 15:10 - Jul 14 with 4388 viewsfooters

No wood on 15:09 - Jul 14 by wkj

Almost as good as Cava then?


"It's not champagne, actually, it's sparkling wine."

W@nkers.

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No wood on 15:12 - Jul 14 with 4384 viewswkj

No wood on 15:10 - Jul 14 by footers

"It's not champagne, actually, it's sparkling wine."

W@nkers.


So what is prosecco then, the council estate of champagne?

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No wood on 15:14 - Jul 14 with 4383 viewsfooters

No wood on 15:12 - Jul 14 by wkj

So what is prosecco then, the council estate of champagne?


The cause of ~30% unplanned pregnancies.

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No wood on 15:22 - Jul 14 with 4373 viewsWeWereZombies

No wood on 15:14 - Jul 14 by footers

The cause of ~30% unplanned pregnancies.


Typical, foreign stuff spurting in and putting 30% of British sperm out of work...

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No wood on 15:25 - Jul 14 with 4369 viewsfooters

No wood on 15:22 - Jul 14 by WeWereZombies

Typical, foreign stuff spurting in and putting 30% of British sperm out of work...


That'll all change after Brexit, mate. Don't you worry about that. I'll be knocking up birds left, right and centre after walking into the party with a Watneys Party Seven.

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No wood on 15:30 - Jul 14 with 4362 viewsWeWereZombies

No wood on 15:25 - Jul 14 by footers

That'll all change after Brexit, mate. Don't you worry about that. I'll be knocking up birds left, right and centre after walking into the party with a Watneys Party Seven.


Sorry to disappoint but all yer birds to the left and in the centre will have left. Do you reckon there is enough room in Katy Hopkins for a Party Seven?

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No wood on 15:37 - Jul 14 with 4356 viewsfooters

No wood on 15:30 - Jul 14 by WeWereZombies

Sorry to disappoint but all yer birds to the left and in the centre will have left. Do you reckon there is enough room in Katy Hopkins for a Party Seven?


Balls.

I did wake up next to a Daily Mail journalist once, tho. Bad times, man.

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No wood on 16:16 - Jul 14 with 4340 viewsWeWereZombies

No wood on 15:37 - Jul 14 by footers

Balls.

I did wake up next to a Daily Mail journalist once, tho. Bad times, man.


Park benches are not what they were...

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No wood on 21:15 - Jul 19 with 4232 viewswkj

No wood on 16:16 - Jul 14 by WeWereZombies

Park benches are not what they were...


You got that right bud

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No wood on 21:15 - Jul 19 with 4225 viewswkj

No wood on 16:16 - Jul 14 by WeWereZombies

Park benches are not what they were...


I miss old school benches

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No wood on 21:55 - Jul 19 with 4170 viewsWeWereZombies

No wood on 21:15 - Jul 19 by wkj

I miss old school benches


Well, yes, too much grime nowadays old chap...

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No wood on 22:05 - Jul 19 with 4164 viewsfooters

No wood on 21:55 - Jul 19 by WeWereZombies

Well, yes, too much grime nowadays old chap...


Do you have a garden, mister Zombers? Does it have , no wood in it?.

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No wood on 22:51 - Jul 19 with 4136 viewsWeWereZombies

No wood on 22:05 - Jul 19 by footers

Do you have a garden, mister Zombers? Does it have , no wood in it?.


Depending on what you count as a bush I have between forty and sixty trees, including a eucalyptus, a copper beech and six cherry trees (a couple of which are currently fruiting, old fruity). So, yes, I have substantial wood. I barely need to make any effort to see it abundant and ready for use...

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No wood on 13:49 - Jul 20 with 4096 viewswkj

No wood on 22:51 - Jul 19 by WeWereZombies

Depending on what you count as a bush I have between forty and sixty trees, including a eucalyptus, a copper beech and six cherry trees (a couple of which are currently fruiting, old fruity). So, yes, I have substantial wood. I barely need to make any effort to see it abundant and ready for use...


I know a chap from Bressingham that enjoys picking up a bit of wood, he has a Renault Partner

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No wood on 15:12 - Jul 20 with 4080 viewsfooters

No wood on 22:51 - Jul 19 by WeWereZombies

Depending on what you count as a bush I have between forty and sixty trees, including a eucalyptus, a copper beech and six cherry trees (a couple of which are currently fruiting, old fruity). So, yes, I have substantial wood. I barely need to make any effort to see it abundant and ready for use...


I am glad to hear you have ample fruity wood :)

wkj, did you check with your local authority regarding whether you are allowed no wood in the green/brown bin? Here in Londonistan it seems there are rules regulating every aspect of one's life, including where you can place your wood.

Dear old footers KC - Private Counsel to Big Farmer - Liberator of Vichy TWTD
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