| TWTD dads... 12:45 - Nov 20 with 17703 views | SitfcB |
As some of you know I'm going to be one myself soon (In the next week or two, still scary to think, I know!)
Now, I just want to know the 'protocol' as such on still partaking in let's say, leisure activities, not necessarily football but mostly football haha.
Obviously I know I have to rein the football in a bit, especially the socialising before/after a home game, but I have booked up Sunderland away as a weekend away in Newcastle at the start of Feb, would you say this is too early to be away from mother and baby? She's obviously not happy about this and I've tried to justify it, and say she can have a weekend away or whatever.
Obviously a lot of you have experience on this and some of you still went away/to football when you had newborns? [Post edited 20 Nov 2017 12:48]
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| TWTD dads... on 12:49 - Nov 20 with 8976 views | StokieBlue |
I think surely that's something best discussed with the other half?
No other situation is going to be exactly the same as your situation.
SB |  |
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| TWTD dads... on 12:50 - Nov 20 with 8975 views | Burwell_Blue |
New baby and you have booked a weekend away a few weeks after the birth, despite being out of the house M-F at work (I presume?)
Yeah, sounds reasonable. Not. |  | | |
| TWTD dads... on 12:50 - Nov 20 with 8977 views | Lord_Lucan |
It obviously depends on your relationship.
I went to Corfu on a lads holiday just after my daughter was born and missed most of her birthdays as it clashes with Queens Day (Now Kings Day) in Holland.
I would think that it is something only you can decide with your girlfriend.
Personally I can't see any reason at all why you shouldn't go to Newcastle |  |
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| TWTD dads... on 12:52 - Nov 20 with 8945 views | SitfcB |
| TWTD dads... on 12:49 - Nov 20 by StokieBlue |
I think surely that's something best discussed with the other half?
No other situation is going to be exactly the same as your situation.
SB |
Yes obviously I realise this and we have discussed it, I just wanted to see what other people have to say, this is the best place to come to  | |
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| TWTD dads... on 12:54 - Nov 20 with 8938 views | BOjK |
I'm not surprised she's not happy.
Looking after a newborn is an immensely tiring and stressful business (as well as being fantastic and all that). You need to shoulder your share of all this. Weekends away can come later. Maybe 18 years later.
Frankly if I were you I wouldn't bank on going to any away games for quite a while. |  |
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| TWTD dads... on 12:55 - Nov 20 with 8933 views | Bluebell |
Here is a female response.
Does your partner have someone who can move in with her while you are away? Nothing better than having a parent or best friend there to help out as babies are very time consuming. She may even prefer that!
If that is the case and she doesn't mind then I say go for it. |  | | |
| TWTD dads... on 12:56 - Nov 20 with 8924 views | SitfcB |
| TWTD dads... on 12:54 - Nov 20 by BOjK |
I'm not surprised she's not happy.
Looking after a newborn is an immensely tiring and stressful business (as well as being fantastic and all that). You need to shoulder your share of all this. Weekends away can come later. Maybe 18 years later.
Frankly if I were you I wouldn't bank on going to any away games for quite a while. |
See, she's happy for me to go to away games if it's there and back on the day, and has said I can go to Sunderland still just not for the weekend. | |
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| TWTD dads... on 12:56 - Nov 20 with 8924 views | No9 |
The one thing you will findwhen you get a bairn is the additional demand on your finances.
Only you can decide if you can afford it but your other half should have a say in what you can do without |  | | |
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| TWTD dads... on 12:57 - Nov 20 with 8912 views | SitfcB |
| TWTD dads... on 12:50 - Nov 20 by Lord_Lucan |
It obviously depends on your relationship.
I went to Corfu on a lads holiday just after my daughter was born and missed most of her birthdays as it clashes with Queens Day (Now Kings Day) in Holland.
I would think that it is something only you can decide with your girlfriend.
Personally I can't see any reason at all why you shouldn't go to Newcastle |
As I say, understand everyone's circumstances are different etc etc and best discussed with her, but this place is always good for all sides of the story haha. | |
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| TWTD dads... on 12:58 - Nov 20 with 8908 views | SitfcB |
| TWTD dads... on 12:55 - Nov 20 by Bluebell |
Here is a female response.
Does your partner have someone who can move in with her while you are away? Nothing better than having a parent or best friend there to help out as babies are very time consuming. She may even prefer that!
If that is the case and she doesn't mind then I say go for it. |
I'd like to think so, we will have a good support network, which we will even need when I am around haha. | |
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| TWTD dads... on 13:02 - Nov 20 with 8867 views | BOjK |
| TWTD dads... on 12:56 - Nov 20 by SitfcB |
See, she's happy for me to go to away games if it's there and back on the day, and has said I can go to Sunderland still just not for the weekend. |
At the moment. She may well come to a completely different view when the baby (congrats BTW) arrives. Do you know how tough it will be to look after a kid for a day by yourself? I didn't think so - and I imagine she doesn't either. It is exhausting.
As it is you've got the green light to go to away games. My advice to you is to be very happy with the arrangement you've got, not to push it, and to expect that she'll ask you to spend some more time at home over weekends when she realises how tired she is.
Be prepared for that, and support her when she asks for this. In years to come you'll look back on the time with the family as something wonderful and irreplaceable. There will always be football matches in 5 years time, but Sitters Jnr will never be that young again. | |
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| TWTD dads... on 13:03 - Nov 20 with 8857 views | uncle |
Everyone is different I suppose, and everyone's circumstances are different, but we have no extended family down here in the wild east(ish).
So very very early on, I ditched the idea of days out to football, weekends away to watch rugby league, and other such things, as there's no way on earth i'd leave the good mrs uncle with the kid(s). To be fair, she used to follow both the football (general) and the rugby (same team), so it didn't seem right on that level either.
And I didn't really miss it, I've had much more fun badly raising kids.
And the first 6 weeks were such torture, i'm not sure I could have got in a car and made it to Ipswich without nodding off. |  | | |
| TWTD dads... on 13:06 - Nov 20 with 8825 views | Fixed_It |
| TWTD dads... on 12:54 - Nov 20 by BOjK |
I'm not surprised she's not happy.
Looking after a newborn is an immensely tiring and stressful business (as well as being fantastic and all that). You need to shoulder your share of all this. Weekends away can come later. Maybe 18 years later.
Frankly if I were you I wouldn't bank on going to any away games for quite a while. |
Joking aside, I took virtually a 16 year sabbatical from football when my kids were younger. Not living in Ipswich obviously made going to the footie more time-consuming anyway - and their Mum worked most weekends as they got older. I wouldn't have missed seeing them grow up for the world - even if Ipswich have been largely sh*t since I started going again just after relegation...
But every individual has different circumstances - just don't underestimate how tired your other half will be when you are not around. |  |
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| TWTD dads... on 13:06 - Nov 20 with 8822 views | giant_stow |
Feb doesn't sound too soon to me, but the trick is negotiation - can you offer her a night away in return? Spose it depends if she'll be breatfeeding or not.
Without wanting to sound like I consider myself to be wise or experienced, you'll both need to look after yourselves as well as the baba. |  |
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| TWTD dads... on 13:06 - Nov 20 with 8816 views | PJH |
| TWTD dads... on 13:02 - Nov 20 by BOjK |
At the moment. She may well come to a completely different view when the baby (congrats BTW) arrives. Do you know how tough it will be to look after a kid for a day by yourself? I didn't think so - and I imagine she doesn't either. It is exhausting.
As it is you've got the green light to go to away games. My advice to you is to be very happy with the arrangement you've got, not to push it, and to expect that she'll ask you to spend some more time at home over weekends when she realises how tired she is.
Be prepared for that, and support her when she asks for this. In years to come you'll look back on the time with the family as something wonderful and irreplaceable. There will always be football matches in 5 years time, but Sitters Jnr will never be that young again. |
and talking of Sitters Jnr, get them enrolled in the Junior Blues asap.
It was 36 years ago but my son was a member within less than 24 hours of his birth.
Very sensible post Mr BOjK. |  | | |
| TWTD dads... on 13:07 - Nov 20 with 8801 views | davblue |
You will want to spend time with them trust me.
It will tail off, i hardly go out anymore, im on the train before my 2 year old wakes up, so i get an hour with him most nights Monday to Friday, so feel guilty going out all the time.
You will also feel tired a lot, so sleep when they do is my advice.
You do need to have time away as it's the most taxing job you can do imo, i would encourage you to do things still but all about the balance. |  | | |
| TWTD dads... on 13:08 - Nov 20 with 8790 views | Deano69 |
Once the little one is here, you will change your mind about lots of things, including how much time you spend at football. Some of those decisions will be forced on you, some will be made as you change perspective on just what is important in life now. |  |
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| TWTD dads... on 13:11 - Nov 20 with 8761 views | Reuser_is_God |
Say to her 'it's about 2 months after you're due to give birth, you'll be over it by then' |  |
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| TWTD dads... on 13:13 - Nov 20 with 8738 views | hype313 |
I personally found spending time rolling around with my new baby far more entertaining than spending time on the A1. |  |
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| TWTD dads... on 13:15 - Nov 20 with 8712 views | hoppy |
| TWTD dads... on 13:06 - Nov 20 by giant_stow |
Feb doesn't sound too soon to me, but the trick is negotiation - can you offer her a night away in return? Spose it depends if she'll be breatfeeding or not.
Without wanting to sound like I consider myself to be wise or experienced, you'll both need to look after yourselves as well as the baba. |
But then, you lot are well into the 'family thing' aren't you? |  |
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| on 13:15 - Nov 20 with 8710 views | _ |
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| TWTD dads... on 13:16 - Nov 20 with 8699 views | hoppy |
| TWTD dads... on 13:13 - Nov 20 by hype313 |
I personally found spending time rolling around with my new baby far more entertaining than spending time on the A1. |
Best not to combine those two activities either. | |
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| TWTD dads... on 13:17 - Nov 20 with 8689 views | hype313 |
| TWTD dads... on 13:16 - Nov 20 by hoppy |
Best not to combine those two activities either. |
I think it's ok now, they have done away with a lot of the roundabouts. | |
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| TWTD dads... on 13:19 - Nov 20 with 8677 views | hoppy |
| TWTD dads... on 13:06 - Nov 20 by PJH |
and talking of Sitters Jnr, get them enrolled in the Junior Blues asap.
It was 36 years ago but my son was a member within less than 24 hours of his birth.
Very sensible post Mr BOjK. |
Indeed. Yasmin had her season ticket from about 4 days old. It would've been sooner, but the ticket office wouldn't accept that she existed until we had the birth certificate, even though I had her in a baby carrier on my chest at the time.
Her first away game was away at Leicester at about 11 or 12 weeks old. | |
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| TWTD dads... on 13:19 - Nov 20 with 8673 views | giant_stow |
| TWTD dads... on 13:15 - Nov 20 by hoppy |
But then, you lot are well into the 'family thing' aren't you? |
oh hoppy...
For what its worth, I had my first night away from the littleun on day 10ish, but that was because mrs ullaa spent 2 weeks in Somerset with her mum and I couldn't dodge a couple fo work things. The M3 was my friend for those two weeks. | |
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